205 < 26 > SEBASTIAN TAKES A LOVER Sebastian had brought the first one home around 1503. Just what in the world was that about? Before he could hazard a guess, Lucy looked back at him. ” “John, do you remember me at all?” “Lucy?!” He cried in disbelief. ’ ‘Oh, you are, are you?’ said the nun, evidently not mollified, but she was forestalled. My destiny, I am afraid, is going to lead me into the ruts. And yet, Spurlock was afraid of the doctor; so was Ruth. She was never able to trace the changes her attitude had undergone, from the time when she believed herself to be the pampered Queen of Fortune, the crown of a good man’s love (and secretly, but nobly, worshipping some one else), to the time when she realized she was in fact just a mannequin for her lover’s imagination, and that he cared no more for the realities of her being, for the things she felt and desired, for the passions and dreams that might move her, than a child cares for the sawdust in its doll. In spite of the tumultuous joy which agitated him, the bridegroom could not prevent the intrusion of some saddening thoughts, as he reflected upon the melancholy scene which he had so recently witnessed in the same place.
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